I once liked a guy. I made the first move too. Then I deleted his contact and moved on.

Before now, apart from loving God, my enthusiasm in church was because I didn’t want to be lukewarm. I didn’t want God to spit me out so I threw myself into church activities.

It’s funny that we say “church mind” like we have two minds. Our hearts have compartments. Maybe God has the largest space but still he shares it with other things.

I once asked God why it was hard for me to find a guy I really like and care about. His response made me laugh ‘cause it seemed ridiculous. I see it now. It’s not even ridiculous at all.

I didn’t plan to write a post. I was listening to TY Bello’s we are fire which is literal fire while studying the Bible when the Holy Spirit told me to write this.

I’m sitting on the bed with my back resting on the wall. My Bible’s on my thighs. My jotter is by my side. My biro’s on my stomach and I’m thinking what exactly does God want from us?

I keep asking why God created this world?

I didn’t ask to be created and now I have to deal with this huge life and be responsible. Quite unfair if you ask me. Lol.

This question reflects the pride in man. Before God created man, man was mere dust. This dust in the question was created and therefore owned by God. Imagine asking your phone: please could I play music with you? Before using it.

Lol. God owns you. You’re free but only in him. You are because he willed you to be. The major thing that keeps us away from God is pride.

Pastor Sam said the gospel is so simple, it takes intelligence to misunderstand it. Look at those people who mock the gospel, they’re brilliant people. Enslaved by the very thing that was supposed to set them free; knowledge. They’ve turned the intelligence given to them as a blessing by God to a curse.

“And God said let us make man in our own image and after our likeness.” “And God said let there be light and there was light. And God saw the light that it was good.”

But you know God never left man to figure out life by himself. Through the ages, God has specially and specifically put systems in place to help and aid man. After giving man the very thing that made him God and man messed up. God still gave his mercy and love. Gave himself. Gave his forgiveness. Gave his grace. What has he not given?

Yet man still asks: where is God? What does he do for us? Why do we have to do everything by ourselves if he really exists and is almighty? I’m ashamed of some questions that I’ve asked in the past. Talmbout, if God is good, why is the world full of evil? Lol.

We’re fond of shirking responsibilities. We boast about being good and upright people like we know what it means to be good. We point fingers. It’s either other people or God, never us. We’re little Mr and Miss perfect.

I can’t imagine God having so much power and still being this tolerant about our selfish, ignorant and wicked selves. From the little I know, if I were God, I’d destroy this world and fellowship with trees instead. I’d start the destruction from myself. We know light has come when we see how depraved both man and the human race is. The day we realize that we’re trouble, troubled and in trouble is going to be a day of freedom.

I used to scoff when I hear that Jesus died for my sins. Like Hezekiah, I had a mostly good record. So I believed that I wasn’t one of the sinners Jesus died for. I was foolish. Lol.

As I listened to Pastor Sam’s sermon in church yesterday, I thought: I didn’t believe in Adam’s sin to become a sinner. Why do I have to believe in Jesus’s work of salvation to be saved? Why can’t every human be automatically saved? Leemao.

Since I didn’t ask for the knife to cut me, why do I have to do anything to stop the bleeding?

Our questions show how irresponsible we are. God should have made us flowers. So we can just sit pretty in the sun everyday of our lives. We don’t want to take responsibility for anything, not our growth or our relationships. Absolutely nothing. We’re so consumed by me me me me. We’re ruled by self. God. Why me? If I were God, my response would be who are you?

We’re lukewarm. Nonchalant. Selfish. Self absorbed and proud. Tbh, satan didn’t do as much as some of us before God cast him out of heaven. So, we’re all these things and we still blame God for not being enough for us. We’re not afraid to say God is not enough. We say don’t judge the people you don’t know. But we don’t see anything wrong in judging the God we don’t know. Some of us even use the scriptures to back up the nonsense the devil has planted in our minds.

What do we want God to do for us? He gave himself to save us from death and darkness. He even gave us ready made righteousness to enhance every area of our lives. He still says come, ask whatever you want. You can have my love, grace and mercy. Take my peace. Take all that I am. In fact, take my life. Take my spirit. Sit on my throne. Oh wait. Let me just dwell in you so you can be just like me.

Our earthly parents will often ask us questions like, do you want to kill me ni? But God didn’t even ask. He volunteered to die for us. He planned his death. He planned our way back to him. But we’re foolish. We’re blinded by a disgusting sense of entitlement. We just want to take take take take and take. And God is not even complaining. But the one thing he’s asking for is too much for us to give. We’re riddled with unbelief and lack of love.

I look at people and laugh when they talk about relationships and say love is not enough. Of course, love is not enough. How will it be enough? Do we even know love? How then will the rubbish we call love be enough? Our love is:

I love you as long as you

I love you because you

I love but when you

Our conditions and rules have choked even the nonsense we call love. So we say it’s not enough. Lol. The problem is not that love is not enough. The problem is that there’s no love.

Someone asked on Twitter, why does the Bible refer to both genders as man in the Bible. Lol.

Feminism is a valid movement in the world because we’re plagued by lack of love and we have to come up with various systems to make up for what we don’t have. Jesus is what we need but of course, this isn’t rational so we come up with the rational strategies like inclusion, feminism, acceptance and what not. Imagine drinking water to quench hunger. We’re using paracetamol to treat cancer. We’re clowns, literally.

You don’t bring feminism to church because in the church, there’s love. We know love. We have love and love is enough. God is enough for us.

It’s funny that we criticize the church because it’s not perfect. We forget that God is perfect yes. A man in God is perfect yes. But a man is still a man. A man still lives in flesh. He’s first a man before he’s in God. So we insult God because of the inadequacies of man. We forget that although a man in God carries God in him, he still has freewill and his flesh still fights him.

We don’t believe in God anymore because some Christians hurt us or maybe a church. What a shame. Imagine God cutting off your oxygen everytime you hurt him. Lol. God’s love and patience is scary.

We can’t blatantly call homosexuality a sin or an abnormality because we have friends that are homosexuals. We have too much respect for sin and that’s why it has a foothold in our lives. We’re going to that place where there is no wrong or right anymore. We go: it depends on how you see it. It depends on your perception. Lol. The pride again. Because if it’s not pride, why do we think we’re wise enough to fine tune God’s laws? Lol. Review panel isonu.

Imagine an ant trying to outsmart you. It’s so ridiculous that it’s hilarious. No wonder he who sits in heaven laughs. We’re goated comedians. We make God’s day everyday with our foolish thoughts and how vain we are. We’re trying to outthink and outsmart the one who gave us life and the rubbish sense that is intoxicating us.

Should I end it here?

Sin is the problem of this world. Not bad leaders. Not corruption. Not misogyny or patriarchy. Not racism. Not poverty. These things are just symptoms. The culprit is sin.

Jesus is the answer but of course Jesus was just a random isrealite, how could he possibly be the solution to the world’s numerous problems? Lol. Why must we be spiritual about everything? Lol.

Help us Jesus. Don’t let our foolishness and pride ruin us. You know I used to think ignorance was our major problem. But I was wrong. Some of us know but pride and our foolish sense won’t let us accept it.

This is the time of need Lord. We have come to the throne of grace to obtain mercy. Show us mercy God. Save us from ourselves. Touch us. We want that heart of flesh you promised to give. Remove this heart of stone like you said you will. Help us to know you. Take away this spirit of pride, foolishness and everything that doesn’t glorify you or look like you.

Let your revival start from our hearts.

Revive us. Restore us. Help us.

We surrender all to you now and always.

It’s not enough to be a Christian. It’s not enough to pray in tongues. It’s not about how much you fast or how much of a nuisance you’ve become in your quest to prove that you’re better than others. Do you know Jesus? Is your heart malleable in his hands? Do you walk in love? Do you understand that you’re nothing without him? Have you put your worthlessness beside his love and broken out in tears because what manner of love does he have for us? Do you know Jesus? Do you really know him? Can the world see him in you? Can he see himself in you?

I don’t know how to end this.

Grace and peace be multiplied unto you in the name of our Lord Jesus. This works too yeah.

Be sure to listen to TY Bello’s we are fire. It had a part to play in this. This is what happens when we allow and reverence the Holy Spirit. He shows us to us and helps us to help us.