This is a mash up of scattered thoughts. It’s quite disorganized but you’d love it because I wrote it. Lol. Enjoyyyy.

I started doubting my posts because I realised that writing here means making the things I’d outgrow, learn to be wrong and what not public. It means having to publicly say “sorry I was wrong” more often than not. Is this enough reason for me to stop writing? Fugg no.

Everyone that has ever published something did so based on their belief at the time of the publication. Their belief can change because growth happens. This growth however doesn’t invalidate their works, it makes it even better because then people can see how far they’ve come, how better they’ve gotten and it just makes the whole thing more beautiful.

So if there’s something I’ve written that you don’t agree with or what not, your takes are highly welcome. And just in case you see contrasting opinions and start to think: this girl must be really confused, I don’t think confusion is the right word because I’m just trying to learn and be better. However, if you still think confusion is the word then cheers to confuscius. Ohh sorry. confusion. (Leemao.)

Truth is, I’d never get to the point of perfection where I’m above mistake or 100% certain of everything I say and write. So there’s no point waiting to have all the wisdom in the world. Hence, I’d just write, learn, unlearn, relearn and grow.

I saw a video about being in love with losing if you want to win in life. It sounds crazy but I totally agree. Being in love with losing means putting yourself out there, vulnerabilities and all. Trying new things, dropping the ones that don’t work without shame and pursuing the ones that do work (without shame too.)

I think it’s important for me to write that I’m a Christian in this blog description (Stylishly done) because that makes me different. As a Christian, I live by a different set of rules as my priority is not to do whatever pleases me but to do whatever pleases God. God first yeah.

The Holy Spirit has been teaching me about growth and love. He’s emphasizing on the fact feelings are unreliable and they have the tendency to hinder growth. It’s important to think before acting. Animals can automatically give in to their natural instincts because they don’t know better but we do. Therefore, the bar is higher for us. You know that thing they say: to whom much is given to, much is expected. (Simply existing as a human is work yeah.)

I’m learning to pay attention to my feelings and express them but not be a slave to them. I’m learning to utilize all that has been made available to me (by my father in heaven) and do what I gotta do. I’m also learning to remember that rest is necessary when it’s necessary.

Now, I understand that growth is hardwork. It means stepping out of myself and my comfort zone. It means pushing myself, seeing the lessons in painful experiences and forging ahead instead of laying down and waiting for a knight in shining armour to save me.

You should know that nothing enhances growth like love. When you genuinely love someone, you don’t only want them to be better, you also want to be better for them. It’s the same when you love God. Love helps you to trust and obey him and this leads you straight to the beautiful purpose he has for your life.

Apparently, I write way more than usual when I’m sad. I’ve been happy and hyper since Thursday so I haven’t been writing. Lol. I’d do better. Happy or not, I’d consistently serve you sweet content.

Do you know why they say the happiest people are usually the saddest? Because these people are naturally intense. So they feel sadness as intensely as they feel joy. I’m such a delight. I can literally light up a room with shenanigans and funny comments the same way I can dampen a room by thinking my melancholic thoughts out loud. We’re big feelers. Most people under this category are creatives by the way. We turn to art and creative activities because art understands and accepts us when people call us too much. (Too much, too extra, too dramatic, too sensitive.)

Now, God is helping me find joy even in melancholic moments such that it has no power over me. The thoughts come but my joy remains while I deal with them. Lol. Talmbout, God brings music out of broken chords. Yes yes, he does. Cheerssssss yoooo.